Uncertain of where to begin, Lisa and Judy visited two battered-women's shelters in Southern California in the summer of 2004. They hoped to discover ways in which the shelters could benefit from the funding and the services the new Gabe Kapler foundation could provide. What Lisa and Judy weren't expecting was the profound impact seeing the faces beyond the stories would have on them.

Lisa and Judy were driven to the first shelter and were surprised to find it was located in a neighborhood they had driven through a thousand times. The need for shelters was closer to home than they had ever imagined. When Lisa and Judy entered the safe house, they sensed the security in the environment; yet the house felt impersonal. 

In the front room, Lisa saw several children. The shelter's director told Lisa and Judy that the woman and her five young children had arrived at this 30-day emergency shelter just a few hours earlier. The four older children were dressed in public school uniforms each one carrying a backpack. That morning, the mother had carried out her risky plan to escape from her abuser by pretending to take her children to school, but instead fleeing to this shelter. To make sure that her abuser wouldn't suspect anything, she had packed only one beanie-baby stuffed animal for each child. 

Now the children were quietly sitting on the couch while their mother signed legal privacy documents. It was heartbreaking to think that only a few short hours ago, these children had been taken from the only world they knew with no forewarning. They had had no opportunity to say good-bye to friends or gather a few personal belongings that might have helped them through this frightening transition.

Lisa’s thoughts wandered. What were these children feeling? What had they seen and heard in their short lives that had led them to a seat on this couch? Had anyone explained to them what was happening or why they were suddenly here in this strange place among these strange people? Had anyone explained to them that it was the violence at home that had driven their mother to bring them here? That they would be safe here? Had they been assured that none of this was their fault?

Lisa glanced at this mother and had a momentary vision that shocked her. She saw herself checking into this house with her two children. This might have been her fate had she not gotten away from her abuser. Lisa was overwhelmed by the need to help this woman and women like her.

The director took Lisa and Judy on a tour of the shelter. A room in a safe house is what this family of 6 would call home for the next month, if they stayed that long. Tomorrow the school age children would be enrolled in a neighborhood school where they would know no one; a school they would attend for the duration of their stay. The youngest child would remain with her mother at the shelter where there was no apparent place for children to play. Each mother was responsible for watching her children at all times, leaving her little time to care for her own needs or to plan for a future after the shelter. 

What would become of this family? Would this mother lose hope and decide to go back to her abuser? Or would she find the strength and support to choose safety and begin a new life for herself and her children? But how was she supposed to find this strength, emotionally and financially, without support and training? And if she did not find the strength, what would become of her children? What would prevent her children from continuing this cycle of abuse if she took them right back to the violence that they had always known?

The second shelter that Lisa and Judy toured provides 9-month transitional housing for five families, a mother and all her children sharing each bedroom. It is not unusual for 4 or 5 family members to occupy one room. This shelter was also located in a familiar neighborhood. Again, Lisa and Judy saw the innocent faces of children who called this shelter home. Their eyes told stories of things no child should ever have to see or hear. The deep emotional scars of the domestic violence these children had witnessed would be long lasting.

Once Lisa and Judy had visited the two shelters, the mission of the Gabe Kapler Foundation came quickly into focus. The foundation had to educate the public about the realities of domestic violence. Domestic violence is just too horrible a crime to be allowed to go on! And the foundation had to provide the funding to educate and support mothers and children housed in battered women’s shelters. When women take that courageous first step to leave their abusers and flee to a shelter with the hope for a better life, they must receive all the help they need to remain free from violence and to create a better life. To deny them this help is unthinkable once you have looked into the eyes of the innocent victims. Going forward, the Gabe Kapler Foundation will do all it can to prevent these women and children from disappearing again into their lives of hidden and denied abuse. Will you please help us?